It's been a minute, hasn't it

Things have finally settled down into a routine.  I am just waiting for an opportunity to go to the Philippines so that I can have Mom's ashes interred at her final resting place.  COVID is still out of control in the Philippines, I'm just waiting until it's safe to travel there, hopefully without 2-week quarantine in a hotel upon arrival.  

My friend that was going to attend Mom's memorial ended up losing both her parents within 24 hours to COVID and had to go there.  She quarantined for a week at a hotel in Manila and a week in the family home with visitor protocols before she could take care of stuff.  I think she was able to do that because she's fully vaccinated.  Sounds like she and her siblings made arrangements to maintain things there and they can have extended vacations.

I have recovered from the car accident, meaning I have my car back 100%.  The body shop even fixed an old dent because it was close to the new damage.  I paid for a rental car out of pocket, which is crazy high rates right now because of COVID.  You can't get an economy or small car, so you have to settle for bigger cars and higher rates.  I have little hope of getting reimbursed even a portion but I've recovered from the financial hit, too.  

I finally got the "letters" so I can start pushing to close things.  Talking to the lawyer today, she assures me the courts here are nothing like LA County, so things will go much faster than the 3 years it took to close Auntie's probate. I'm hoping to file to close by the end of the year, but that'll depend on if how much of an asshole my employer's going to be or else I'll be retiring earlier than I intend.

I'm still trying to figure out life after Mom.  Taking care of her was my purpose for the last 10-15 years.  I was building my life when she literally started moving her stuff in every weekend.  I was doing things, like martial arts, that I gave up for fine arts.  She ruined my diet, completely ignoring her own diabetes.  I must admit, I'm eating out more now and I miss sharing my meals with her.  We weren't splitting to save money as much as because of the big portion sizes.  One plate was enough to split with her and we can both have leftovers the next day.  

Life is knocking me around

Had the hardest time scheduling Mom's memorial at her church.  The church office is run by a troop of monkeys, all named Maria.  I was persistent until I finally got what I wanted for her.  It worked out in the end, the small gathering of best friends and family were all there.  

But the Thursday before, I was just waiting at a stop light a mile from home when I was smashed from behind and pushed into the car in front of me.  Honestly, the impact knocked my glasses off, I really believe I rolled into the car in front because I was blind until I found my glasses.  I didn't want to deal with that driver's crappy insurance, so I'm going through State Farm.  They are so easy to work with, and only Auto Club (AAA) is slightly easier to deal with.  Unfortunately, I have to pay for the rental cars out of pocket which is going to run almost $2000 until I get my car back from the body shop.  Rentals are hard to get right now so you have to go up in size until you find availablility. My car was still drivable, but it was 100 miles to Mom's memorial and I wasn't comfortable driving it the distance until it was checked out.  It was nice to relax with family afterward, another 30 miles vs 100 to home.  LA freeways were horrible!

I think something's going around at work.  Started out the week thinking I was having allergies from being outside and sleeping with the fan on.  I think it's turning into a cold.  I'm hearing my coworkers also sniffling & coughing to clear their throats.

How about now?

RIP Mom.

Unfortunately I jinxed my brother's birthday forever.  I was telling him at the end of birthday dinner "at least Mom didn't die on your birthday."  Doh! Then I got the call.  The day ain't over yet.

Do I look like my best friend just died?

RIP Kathy,

We met at our first professional job out of college (early 80's) and as we went on with our professional lives (we moved away for our next jobs) we stayed in touch as pen pals.  Then in 1999, when I was job searching for a company to pay for my move back to California, my job interview was in the same city she had settled to after a big earthquake destroyed her apartment/life in Sylmar.  We had dinner, a long catch-up, and she gave me the night tour of the city. We were a pair of similarly geeky girls.

She struggled with her health for the last 5 years and retired early.  Then she moved to Utah to be close to her brother and his family.   I mean, her brother's kids are well out of college by now, I think they're married, and pursuing their professions around the world but they visited home frequently.  We had a phone call a month ago, she was so excited that she'd gotten her 2nd vaccine dose.  She was in assisted living and had been under lockdown since last March, just like Mom.

Ever since Grandma passed in the '90s, until 2018, I've always been aware of how few people who I've personally known had died.  Then I reached age 55 and lost three family members that year.  I really didn't know how to deal with these losses.  I am prepared for Mom to go, but two deaths this week!  My auntie's 2nd BFF, Lulu, died Tues night in her sleep, she was 72 and had just retired from working.

I had a bunch of tasks planned for this weekend but after I got the news about Kathy, I've just been moping around the house.  I'm actually surprised at how bummed I got when I heard about Auntie Lulu, but she was so instrumental in helping me with my auntie's passing.

Almost March

I'm finally having a productive weekend.  I got so much done and it's still only Saturday.  It definitely has to do with the temperature outside and now it's daylight until 6pm.  I would have gotten more done but I can't find my saw-saw.  Garage access is so limited right now.  The coffee table deteriorated surprisingly quickly in the back yard, now I need to chop it up to fit in the trash bin.  I'd better donate the rest while it still looks usable.  Damn, can't do that on a Sunday.

I've given up on the guy that does the wrought iron gate.  It was so hard to get him to call me in the first place, then he gave me a quote.  Two weeks later, I got the stimulus "check" (Visa card), I called him back to schedule the job.  Never heard from him again.  I'm thinking of putting it off and continuing the pavers into the front yard.  Progress in the back yard is slow, but progressing nonetheless in the right direction.

It's February, It's cold.

It's cold from the the middle of the country to the east coast.  Crazy snow & ice related pileups make nationwide news.

But I'm in a t-shirt in California.  It's in the 60's.  Too cold for outdoor dining, indoor dining is not allowed yet.  Too cold to work on my yards.  The damn bougainvillea is climbing over the block wall again.  It's just my house, nobody else has HOA plants coming into their space to maintain.  I've been wasting my weekends for all the stuff I still want to do in my yards.  I can't get the gate guy to call me back to start the job.  Mom's apartment furniture is in the back yard deteriorating as fast as she is.  I can only visit for 15 minutes once a week, but at least I can see her regularly.

A month ago, my uncle (mom's brother, 3 years younger) and his wife got COVID.  My cousin (his daughter) brought them to her house to recover but the wife was having breathing problems so she ended up in ER a couple times.  Then cousin got COVID from caring for them.  She's the only one in the house who is working, but she's back to work again.  Uncle & wifey have accepted cousin's offer to move to her house.  His plan was to permanently move to Philippines by now but COVID put a huge kink in his plans.